Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun.

Birthdays are good for you; the more you have, the longer you live.

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.

Ever notice that the people who are late are often much jollier than the people who have to wait for them?

If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?

Most of us go to our grave with our music still inside of us.

If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day, how come nothing is free yet?

You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.

Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened.

We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors...but they all have to learn to live in the same box.

Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.

A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.

Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.

The goal of science is to build better mousetraps. The goal of nature is to build better mice.

"It's easier said than done."
If you don't believe it, try proving that it's easier done than said, and you'll see that "it's easier said that `it's easier done than said' than it is done", which really proves that "it's easier said than done".

QUIDQUID LATINE DICTUM SIT, PROFUNDUM VIDITUR:
If you say it in Latin, it looks more profound.

"What is the sound of Perl? Is it not the sound of a wall that people have stopped banging their heads against?"
     -- anonymous cgi-perl programmer

Why did the computer programmer die in the shower? The directions said: Shampoo, rinse, repeat.

"Those are our principles. If you don't like them, we have others."
     -- buddycom

Two Zen disciples once argued about the relative Zen powers of their masters.
Said the first: My master's Zen is so powerful that by simply moving his brush in the air while I stand on the other side of the river holding rice paper, blessed characters appear on the paper.
Said the second: My master's Zen is so powerful that he eats when he is hungry and sleeps when he is tired.

We cannot say that we do not disagree with you.
     -- buddycom